Funny sms jokes

Pathan Saw A Man Stealing A Purse
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Theif: There Is 1000 Rs in The Purse
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We Can Take 50-50
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pathan: OK..OK
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But What About The
Remaining 900…

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Father:The school report gives you ‘D’
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for conduct and an ‘A’ for courtesy.
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How did you manage that?
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Son:Whenever I punch someone,
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I apologise

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A Cardiologist Died,
According to His will,
He was buried in a Heart shaped grave.
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One of the doctors Laughed at the grave.
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People asked,
”Why did you laugh at the heart shaped grave?”
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Doctor Replied,
”I am thinking about my grave.
I am a Gynaecologist!!”

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Newton’s 6th Law of Motion:
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“Loose Motions can never be done in slow motion”:-D

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Q1: What is RED & goes TRING TRING?
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Ans: a tomato..! & TRING TRING was to confuse you!
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Here’s 1 more!
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Q2. what is RED & goes on TRING TRING??
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Ans: the door bell & RED was to confuse you!
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Q3. what is RED & goes TRING TRING??
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Ans: a cake..!
& both were to confuse you!
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Anyways!
1 more!
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Q4:what is RED & goes TRING TRING?
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Ans: Fire brigade obviously…!
&
You thought I was trying to confuse u…

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High level confidence!
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Teacher 2 student: If u tel me ‘where is GOD’, i’ll reward u 100 rupees.
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Student : n If u tell me’whr GOD is not’i'l reward u
200Rs

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Father to son:
If u dont pass ur exams this time,
Dnt call me DAD.
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After some days……
Father:
How is ur result?
Son:
Sorry Bashir sab…:-

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Love+ship= Titanic
Dinosar+Forest= Jurasic park
Arnold+Gun= Terminator
U+ur smile= The mummy returns

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an a Woman make you a Millionaire?
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Yes ! ! ! ! !

If you are a Billionaire…. %)

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Can you name three consecutive days without using the words
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, or Sunday?

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Answer:
Sure you can: Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow!